Paranoid
by Judah Barracuda
Summary: Bella has always felt like she is being watched. What happens when her suspicions are confirmed? AU. Dark. ooc. M. Canon couples - E/B Em/R J/A C/Es


**Disclaimer: I own nothing but my freakish thoughts and absurd fantasies. Oh, and this laptop I used to write this.**

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**Paranoid**

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_**When I'm in the shower**_

_**I'm afraid to wash my hair**_

_**'Cause I might open my eyes**_

_**And find someone standing there**_

_**People say I'm crazy**_

_**Just a little touched**_

_**But maybe showers remind me**_

_**Of Psycho too much**_

_**That's why**_

_**I always feel like**_

_**Somebody's watching me**_

_**And I have no Privacy... ~Rockwell**_

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**1: Penatration and Sneaking Suspicions Confirmed**

_What was that?_

My head snapped to the window next to my desk so fast, it cracked painfully. I thought I saw something in the woods, but when I looked, there was nothing. Typical. So fucking typical. I sighed and leaned back in my seat, tapping my pencil on my notebook and pretending to listen to Mr. Banner drone on about cells and other boring shit.

I always kept my peripheral on the window.

Something is there. I know it. I'm not just paranoid; no matter what my parents or psychologist will have people believe.

Ever since I was 15, I've had this sneaking, gnawing, suspicion that I am being watched. Monitored. My every freaking move feels like it's being caught on surveillance.

I know someone is watching me.

I'm not crazy.

It has been three years since I started feeling this way. Three horrible, back-watching, years of anxiety and weird looks. People think I'm crazy, but... I know better.

Someone. Is. Watching. Me.

"Bella...?"

"Huh?" I was brought out of my musings by a slim white hand waving wildly in front of my face. "Yeah, Rose?"

Rosalie Lillian Hale is my best friend. Like, ever. I don't exactly know how we work, but we do. She's Miss Popularity. I'm Miss Get The Fuck Out Of My Face. She's a blonde bombshell. I'm a skinny brunette. She's... well, you get it. Oil and water. But ever since kindergarten, we've been connected at the hip. All thanks to a red marker incident that I'd rather not get into.

"What are you so thinky about?" she asked, her sparkling blue eyes inquisitive.

"Nothing," I sighed, stretching my sore neck. She knows all about my 'paranoia'. She thinks I'm crazy, too, so I don't bother bringing it up anymore.

She didn't look like she believed me, her thick lips pursed, but she let it slide. For now.

When the bell rang for class to be over, Rose grabbed my hand and dragged me to the cafeteria, the whole way going on about her latest tryst with Tyler Crowley. Tyler Crowley is the quarterback of our small football team, and the resident hunk; with dark hair, light brown eyes, and caramel skin, he's easily the best looking guy Forks has to offer.

And I just _loved _hearing about how well he could, ahem, eat out.

_Gag._

"This boy knows how to make me scream, Bella," she snickered at my reddened cheeks as we entered the lunch line behind Lauren Mallory and Jessica Stanley, the resident Gossip Ho's. No coincidence, I am sure. Rose likes her dirty deeds spread around, and what better way than those two catching a whiff?

"Wow," I said lamely. I couldn't even pretend to be interested. I'm not as experienced as she, so talking about sex isn't really that fun for me. I mean, I am no prude – thank you, Mike Newton – but I am no expert either. Not even amateur level.

What's below amateur?

"Hello! Earth to Bella," Rose growled, clearly irritated with my inability to listen to her gloating. "I am trying to tell you about my crazy, wild night of debauchery and you don't even have the decency to look at me?"

I turned my eyes to her and mock glared. "I'm sorry. I was busy not caring."

"Bitch," she hissed playfully.

I laughed and moved up in line, grabbing two trays and handing one off to her. "You know I love you," I said sincerely, "but I just don't care about what holes on your body were penetrated."

She snorted and shook her head. "You would totally be into this if _your_ holes were being penetrated. Speaking of which..." she smiled brightly, her eyes landing on Felix Barone across the room.

And, _oh god, here we go again._

"He wants you," she taunted in her nasliest of voices. "He wants to penetrate you."

I rolled my eyes and decided to ignore her, holding out my tray for the lunch lady to drop a slab of something yellow on it. For as long as I can remember, Rose has been trying to get me on her 'level'. And she thinks that Felix is the perfect man for that. He's known for taking virgins and turning them into sex-crazed crazies. I've been on his list for quite a while now.

I'm not interested. I had one sexual experience and it bombed. Big time. Thank you, Mike Newton. I sent a glare to the premature exploder, and reflexively wiped at the base of my tummy, still feeling like the remnants of that horrid night were etched into my skin there.

_Yeah, no sex for Bella._

We took our food and went to our normal table in the far left corner; where we always ate alone. We preferred it that way. We think two is company, and three is a crowd.

As we ate, talking about this and that, I got that familiar tingling sensation starting from the base of my spine, working its way up to the back of my head. All the hair on my body stood on end.

_Who's there?_

I tried to be inconspicuous as I peeked out the large cafeteria window.

Nothing was there. But it was weird. I didn't feel like that was where I should be looking. Usually, when I get that feeling of being watched, all the paranoia is focused on the window... but... no... I looked to the door that shut the parking lot out from the cafeteria just in time to see it slam shut, taking with it the remnants of a tall shadow. It echoed in my head like an alarm.

_Someone really was there..._

_Someone really was watching me.._

I jumped when I felt a sharp kick at my ankle. I hissed under my breath and glared at Rose across the table. She just raised her perfectly arched brow in question.

"Who pissed in your coffee?"

"What?"

"Why do you look like you're about to vomit? Seriously, you're paler than usual."

"Uh..." Did I tell her? Yeah right. I've tried many times before. I just get brushed off and told I am crazy. But, I _know_ I saw someone this time! I took a deep breath. "Rose... before you go and say I'm insane and have seen one too many scary movies, just listen, okay?"

She nodded her head, leaning in close to me and looking concerned.

"Okay," I sighed, bracing myself. "You know how I've always said that I feel like somebody's watching me?" She nodded. "Well, lately, I haven't just had the _feeling _that I am being watched. I've... seen things... someone, I think. But they always get away before I can get a good look. And, just now-"

"Wait, wait, wait," she waved her hands between us wildly, shaking her head, her golden locks flailing about. "Before you continue, are you currently taking your meds?"

"YES!" My voice carried and echoed in the small lunchroom. I didn't even care about the eyes I felt trained on my face. I was fed up.

"Yes, Rosalie, I am taking my meds, just like I am supposed to! They don't help, because I am not just paranoid and anxious. There is really someone there!"

"Okay, okay," she tried to soothe me, but I was passed that now. I pushed her away and shot up from the table, nearly knocking my tray over in the process.

"I have to go." I kept my head down as I left in a hurry, the tears stinging and gathering at the corners of my eyes.

No one will ever believe me.

I'm just crazy.

I didn't bother to grab my things. I just made a break for my big red truck, pulling my keys from my back pocket. Fumbling with the lock, I dropped my keys into a puddle. Just as I bent down to pick them up, a white hand shot out from behind me, grabbing them before I could.

And the tingling sensation was back. Full force.


End file.
